Tuesday, September 1, 2009

15 months 26 days

To: Mom
Fr: Zoey
RE: Update on Rules

It's been a while since my last memo but I figured it was time since you seem to be a little slow on picking up on the new rules.

1. Any time that I am not playing with water in the kitchen sink is wasted. WASTED.

2. Whining is a valid form of communication.

3. I can do it myself.

4. Except sometimes I don't want to do it myself. See #2.

5. I am now tall enough to reach the kitchen table and the counters. Anything within my reach is fair game.

6. I have zero frustration tolerance. When something does not go my way I will let you know. See #2.

7. There are moments in which I like _____ (insert any food) and moments when I don't. If you really loved me you would know which food to feed me.

8. I like to wear fancy shoes. See #6

9. Getting dressed is a game. My job is to run from you and make it as difficult as possible.

10. See #9 and insert diaper changing.

11. I am a climber of ALL THINGS. Do not try and stop me. I am also a biter.

12. I will continue my facade of being cute and adorably shy in public to undermine your 'blog'.

13. Please do NOT ask me if I went "poo-poo" in front of my friends. It's embarrassing.

14. My method of using a fork is genius: stab something, pull off the stabbed thing with hand, use hand to shove thing into mouth. GENIUS!

15. I am not a baby. Please stop referring to me a such. I prefer to be called Most Important Thing In the Universe or Super Zoey.


  1. zoey, i wrote this exact same memo to my wife last week, and for some reason, it didn't work. i know you are stronger and smarter than i, so i am sure your memo will be the law of the land at your house.

  2. I will totally call you SuperZoey!

  3. Fancy shoes are a must. As are the fancy dresses....every day....all day.....you will get there...don't worry.....

  4. Amazing... and on top of it all, she's writing clever memos to her Mom.

  5. Zozo (oops, I mean Super Zoey), you are so organized to leave such a nice list for Mom to read. I think you also need to write one for playdate rules. We may need to have you and CJ collaborate on that one.

  6. Justin was a negotiater. He didn't run away...he'd wear you down by discussing the terms of all aspects of his life. As a dad, I could get what I wanted from him if I met the terms and conditions. His first sentence was "Let's make a deal!"

    Little has changed in 27 years :)

  7. My goodness, she's grown since her last memo.

    Wow - can your family handle it with TWO gifted writers in the house?