Thursday, May 26, 2011


I often see other moms -- in person, on Facebook, where ever -- and these other moms often look put together. I suspect they have showered and brushed their hair. And maybe even folded and put away their laundry before every piece of clean clothing becomes a wrinkled mess from sitting in the laundry basket for 3 days. Also, they seem to have a faint and lovely glow. Hopefully, this glow comes from make-up and not from the joyous fulfillment that motherhood provides. If it's the latter . . . well. I give up. These moms, they are also wearing cute clothes. Clothes that seem to, you know, fit. And jewelry. Beaded necklaces, silver bracelets, dangly earrings. These put-together moms seem like they're . . . winning. Winning the battle against sleep depravation, toddler tantrums, and general momness.
I, on the other hand, am not so much winning as slogging along. I am the epitome of frumpiness. My hair is sort of straggly. My clothes are either too big or pull too tight in unflattering places. It goes without saying that everything is wrinkled. No make-up. No jewelry. I do, however, shower. Occasionally. And sometimes I even remember to brush my hair.
Some of my disheveledness is by choice. I often don't invest much time in my appearance (like applying make-up or flat ironing my hair) because I would rather be doing other things -- sleeping, picnicking, eating chocolate. I don't need to be matchy-matchy every time I go out. A hat and a pont-tail often suit me just fine. I'm OK wearing yoga pants to the grocery store.
The thing is, even when I try to look put-together, I still somehow fail. I get deodorant streaks on the side of my navy dress. And I don't notice them until we have left the house. There's part of a smooshed granola bar on the butt of my grey slacks. My hair won't stay in place. The blush, which I thought I was applying on my cheek bones at home in the dim light of the bathroom, now seems to be smeared randomly all over my face. . Somehow I only have lipstick on my bottom lip. I couldn't find my other black sandal so I had to wear the brown ones that are missing a buckle. I forgot to put on a belt and my pants are falling off. And there is just no way that one can seem put-together while constantly hitching up one's pants. NO. WAY.
So . . . how do you do it? How do you look so put-together? While I await your answers I might go fold some laundry. Laundry that's been in the dryer for 3 days.


  1. We have receently aquired a new line of towels and bedding: a muted greenish shade. A shade resulting from having sat, wet, in the washing machine under a wet green blanket for a week. A shade that, despite multiple re-washes, refuses to budge. A shade that matches the general level of Just-Not-Quite-"Right" around here: case in point - Me. That said, I HAVE showered today AND washed my hair. I even have earings in. So, regardless of the fact that the extra green-cycle washes have delayed washing those 2 overdue dark clothes loads... I've gone with the light colors today and may even put some lipgloss on :-)
    (I LOVE your writing, Jos!! THANK YOU!!)
    -Michelle Williams

  2. Michelle, HA! I bet the green bedding looks lovely. You could always re-paint the whole room to match. And, now that you mention it, I do wear chapstick every day. I'm a fashion plate, baby! But nothing compared to you with your earrings. And washed hair. :)

  3. I hate folding clothes, and only buy wrinkle free shirts now so at least I can grab something from one of the three full laundry baskets. We keep a small couch in our bedroom so we have somewhere to put things after we wash them.

  4. Josh, We keep a drying rack and book shelf in our bedroom for the same purpose. :)

  5. I am not especially frazzled, but I also suck at looking and feeling pulled together. Here's what I do:
    1. Silver hoop earrings. These make it look like I did something on purpose, namely accessorizing.
    2. One utilitarian but cute light jacket. I have this one cotton jacket I got on clearance that I can throw on over any greasy old tank top and look like I made some kind of effort.
    3. Sunglasses. Mine are Rx, so I feel kind of obnoxious because I cannot take them off indoors and render myself legally blind and a hazard to others. But they make me feel a little hip and a little hidden.
    4. I own very few items of clothing that require ironing. Ugh.
    5. Spend a little money on jeans that fit great. It's a struggle, I hate it. I have a big ass and a small waist. But good jeans are worth their weight in sleep.